Virgin

In Roman times, the Vestal Virgins remained celibate for 30 years on penalty of death

Virginity is a term used to describe the state of never having engaged in sexual intercourse. A person who still has his or her virginity can accordingly be described as being a virgin. In broader usage of these terms, they can characterize a state of purity. For example, some cocktails can be described as being "virgin" when they lack alcoholic content. (There is a grade of olive oil called "virgin," as well as a grade called "extra-virgin": the actual definitions are surprising.) Alternatively, it can indicate a lack of experience, such as a player of bingo being described as virgin when he is a newcomer to the game. In other contexts, these terms can apply to someone who has not engaged in sexual activities in general.

Etymology

With the standard usage of these terms (where the state of purity is thought to come from a lack of sexual intercourse), they have been more commonly applied to women than to men, both historically and in many present-day situations. In fact, the terms traditionally were used to simply describe a female unmarried person: It was introduced to English in the 13th century, and via French virgine derived from Latin virgo (Genitive virginis), which is composed of "vir" meaning "man" or "husband," and "genere," "created (for)," and already had the meaning of a female in (nuptial) subjection to a male. During the Middle English period, the word "maid" referred to a person, whether male or female, who had never been married or sexually active. Geoffrey Chaucer, for instance, used that word in reference to Christ and St. Paul. However, applying the term to men as well has become uncommon in modern times, as the word "maid" lost currency in reference to men.

Physiology

Among human females, the hymen is a membrane, part of the vulva, which partially occludes the entrance to the vagina and which may be physically torn when the woman first engages in sexual intercourse. The human hymen can vary in thickness, shape, and flexibility. The presence of an intact membrane is often seen as physical evidence of virginity in the broader technical sense.

In some women, the hymen is sufficiently vestigial to pose no obstruction to the entryway of the vagina. The presence of a broken hymen may indicate that the vagina has been penetrated, or it may indicate damage caused by strenuous exercise or the forceful insertion of a tampon.

In contrast to the cases of an absent or partial hymen, in rare cases a woman may possess an imperforate hymen, such as prevents the release of menstrual discharge. A surgical procedure known as hymenotomy which creates an opening in the hymen is sometimes required to avert deleterious health effects.

The presence of a hymen is a possible indication, but not a guarantee of virginity, given that it is speculated that some degree of sexual activity may occur without rupturing the hymen, given that there may exist varying definitions as to the type and extent of sexual activity that is required to terminate the state of "virginity." This is further complicated by the availability of hymenorrhaphy surgical procedures to repair or replace the hymen.

In some cultures, women are not regarded as virgins after a sexual assault, but some people disavow this notion. There are also those who take this "spiritual" concept of virginity to its maximum, considering "born again virgins" to be virgins, regardless of their past sexual conduct. However, the word "chastity" is often used in this context rather than "virginity."

In males, there is no physically visible indicator of virginity.

In culture

The status of virginity is respected and valued in certain societies, particularly when there are religious views regarding sexual conduct before marriage. A woman who is a virgin is also sometimes referred to as a maiden.

Female virginity is closely interwoven with personal or even family honor in many cultures. Traditionally in some cultures there has been a widespread belief that the loss of virginity before marriage is a matter of deep shame. In some cultures (for example the Bantu of South Africa), virginity testing (infibulation) is commonplace. This would typically involve personal inspection by a female elder.

Traditionally in Western marriage ceremonies, a veil is taken as a symbol of the bride's virginity; the white dress is also commonly considered a sign of virginity. The extent to which this symbolism is accurate is unclear, given that some women may choose to wear white even if they are no longer virgins. This may even hold true for women who are assumed to be non-virgins (for example, those involved in a second marriage), but the practice is not universal.

Technical Virginity

Some historians and anthropologists note that many societies that place a high value on virginity before marriage, such as the United States before the sexual revolution, actually have a large amount of premarital sexual activity that does not involve vaginal penetration: e.g., oral sex, anal sex and mutual masturbation. Some refer to this as "technical" virginity. In Norman Mailer's novel Harlot's Ghost, a character states that in Italy, an unmarried woman had to be "a maiden before and a martyr behind," which implied that

1. such women often resorted to anal sex, and
2. anal sex was consistently painful.

Sex educators Tristan Taormino and Nina Hartley would dispute the second assumption.

Loss of virginity

The act of losing one's virginity, that is, of a first sexual experience, is commonly considered within Western culture to be an important life event and a rite of passage. It is highlighted by many mainstream Western movies (particularly films aimed at a teenaged audience). The loss of virginity can be viewed as a milestone to be proud of or as a failure to be ashamed of, depending on cultural perceptions. Historically, these perceptions were heavily influenced by perceived gender roles, such that for a male the association was more often with pride and for a female the association was more often with shame. (See Double standard.)

The partner during the loss of virginity is sometimes colloquially said to "take" the virginity of the virgin partner. In some places, this colloquialism is only used when the partner is not a virgin, but in other places, the virginity of the partner does not matter. The archaic term "deflower" is sometimes used in modern times to also describe the act of the virgin's partner, and the clinical term "defloration" is another way to describe the event.

One slang term used for virginity is "cherry" (often, this is the term to refer to the hymen, but can refer to virginity in males or females) and for a virgin, deflowering is to "pop their cherry," a reference to destruction of the hymen during first intercourse.

A curious term often seen in English translations of the works of the Marquis de Sade is "to depucelate." This word is apparently a literal translation of "dépuceler," a French verb derived from "pucelle" (n.f.), which means "virgin" and is the root of the modern slang term "pussy." (Joan of Arc was commonly called "la Pucelle" by her admirers, most likely in reference to the Virgin Mary, another highly respected woman at that time.)

In some countries until the late 20th century, if a man did not marry a woman whose virginity he took, the woman was allowed to sue the man for money, in some languages named "wreath money".

Loss of virginity can be fatal in some Islamic countries. The custom of honor killing, which is encouraged by local custom but not the Koran, requires a man to kill a daughter or sister who has "dishonored the family" by losing her virginity before marriage, even by rape.

Religion

Mythology

Virginity has been often considered to be a virtue denoting purity and physical self-restraint and is an important characteristic of some mythical figures such as the Greek goddesses Athena, Artemis, and Hestia. The Vestal Virgins were strictly celibate priestesses of Vesta. The Maiden or Virgin is one of the three persons of the Triple Goddess in many Neopagan traditions. The constellation Virgo represents a wide selection of sacred virgins.

Hinduism

In predominantly Hindu societies in Nepal and India, any form of premarital sexual intercourse is frowned upon immensely and is considered an act designed to bring great dishonor and disrespect to the family. "Living in" is also frowned upon and people in a live-in relationship tend to be ostracized on all social occasions.^{[citation needed]}.

It is for this reason that although there is a growing tendency for Indian youth to date and choose their own partners, rather than having arranged marriages; only a small percentage of these couples engage in sexual intercourse before their wedding. This applies even to couples who choose to share a place of residence..^{[citation needed]}

Due to the widespread acceptance of Hindusim in Nepal & India, arranged marriages (arranged by the parents after comparing horoscopes) are extremely common place across all strata of society. In such an arranged marriage between a boy and a girl, who have never been married before, they are both implicitly assumed to be virgins.

If the bride is not found to be a virgin on the wedding night, the groom, irrespective of educational and social standing, is known to have annulled the marriage on the next day.(this is not applicable, no such incident has ever occured at least in Nepal) ^{[citation needed]}. This treatment of the woman only worsens in uneducated and impoverished pockets of the country.

On account of this implicit requirement for virginity, divorces, remarriages, widow remarriages and other relationships where the female partner's virginity is questionable, are frowned on and are hence not easily accepted by most Indians, although this is changing in the face of rapid globalization and liberalization.^{[citation needed]}.

However in cities like Kathmandu and Pokhara, the number of people losing virginity before their marriage is increasing. Due to the influence of Western movies and shows, school and college students in Kathmandu have developed a feeling that remaining virgin is not cool. This has attacked the old traditional conventions of Hinduism badly.

Christianity

Medieval Christian society regarded the loss of virginity outside of marriage as sinful.

Until recently, some Christian states have or have had laws protecting virginity. Germany abandoned a law (§1300 BGB) only in 1998 that entitled the deflowered virgin to compensation if the relationship ended. In Mexico, there is a very old saying still used by females today: "Fulfill your promise to marry me (if we had sex), or leave me how I was (virgin)." ^{(former) situation in other countries needed}

Some Christians today say that virginity indicates a requisite state of holiness in terms of sexuality before marriage, and most Christian denominations officially follow the belief that the New Testament of the Christian Bible forbids pre-marital sex of any form. These ideas are more openly discussed throughout the Old Testament; phrases that describe sex as the union of both man and woman in one flesh exemplify the importance of both sexes remaining abstinent until the day they find spouses.

Islam

Islam provides a very strict decree that sexual activity must occur only between married individuals. Quotes such as 'Do not even go near Adultery' (Al-Israa 17: 32), are testament to this.

Qur'an 17:32 says "And come not near to the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a Fâhishah [i.e. anything that transgresses its limits (a great sin)], and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allâh forgives him)." Unlawful sexual intercourse in this context refers both to adultery and premarital sex.^{[citation needed]}

Judaism

Virginity appears in Judaism as early as the verse in Genesis, referring to Eliezer's encounter with Rebekah: 'And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her' (Genesis 24:16) and is a recurring theme throughout the Bible, especially with regard to the laws governing betrothal, marriage and divorce.

However, in practice, Judaism is fairly lenient about sexual relations, and has been since its early days, fairly pragmatic about the realities of sex and sexuality. Sex in Judaism is not seen as dirty or undesirable — in fact, sex within a marriage is considered a mitzvah, or desirable virtue. Jewish law contains rules related to and protecting female virgins and dealing with consensual and non-consensual pre-marital sex. The thrust of Jewish law's guidance on sex is effectively that it should not be rejected, but should be lived as a wholesome part of life.

According to Jewish teaching, sex before marriage is forbidden. However, a child born of an unmarried Jewish woman is not illegitimate, and is a full member of the Jewish people. A child born of illegitimate relations, eg. adultery, incest and other relation types, is considered illegitimate (a mamzer) and can not marry into the Jewish people. However, they can marry another illegitimate person.

The more liberal denominations (Reconstructionist Judaism, Reform Judaism, and Conservative Judaism) are relatively open to pre-marital sex: while it is not encouraged, it is not ignored, either — rules governing sexuality still apply, etc. In stricter denominations, sex before marriage can be relatively uncommon, as religious practices of modesty, marriages at a younger age, and other practices, may apply.

External links

• Virgin at Dictionary.com, an exposition of the many possible meanings of "virgin"
• "Virginity" at Rotten.com, which includes one list of lifelong virgins, and another of non-virgins (with year they lost virginity)
• Magical Cups and Bloody Brides by Heather Corinna - Explores the historical context of virginity in a frank and easy-to-understand manner.
• 20 Questions About Virginity - Interview with Hanne Blank, author of an upcoming book on virginity. Discusses relationship between hymen and concept of virginity.
• Virgin: The Untouched History Frequently Asked Questions - FAQ for Hanne Blank's upcoming book about the history of virginity in the Western World.
• The virginity code: the full story, survey results from CosmoGirl on definition of virginity and related questions
• Social, Medical, and Legal Control of Female Sexuality through Construction of Virginity in Turkey - A scholarly research on the social construction of virginity.
• The Virgin Files - Journal of a 28 year old female virgin

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